A Pisces' Guide to Love

    I have always been a person who loves very deeply. No matter what kind of love it may be, platonic or romantic, the people I love will always be aware of it. They will constantly be showered with appreciation, words of affirmation, and affection., I will defend them wholeheartedly, I will support them through everything. If a loved one asked me to come over because they just needed a hug, I would drop everything instantly to be there. I will make countless sacrifices for my loved ones. I will do anything for them. 

    Many people may say I display the exact same feelings about love that Pisces placements do. That would be true, because I happen to be one lol.  Now, I have never been huge into astrology in the past. But recently, I have been enjoying learning about it and discovering my and my friends' placements. Of course, it isn't all science-based facts, but it is fun to see how people classify and whether they identify with the traits of their sign. And after much research, I have found that I deeply identify with my entire astrology chart. All of my placements seem to so accurately describe different aspects of my personality perfectly. At times, it has been scarily accurate. I find myself really questioning the validity of other things...because who deemed that it wasn't real in the first place? Is there evidence against it? Who knows. But I digress because that isn't the topic of this blog. The topic is love, my relationship with it, and how learning about astrology has shifted my perspective on it. 

    One of my friends went through a breakup recently, and through her healing journey, she has decided to create a list of things she needs in a relationship in order for it to work. (keyword - NEEDS - as in, non-negotiables). I had never really done anything like that, even when I was single. So I thought to myself, even though I am currently in a relationship, that it may be a good idea to write out my own version of that list. I felt it may be a little difficult for me, as I have so many standards that are pretty essential to me. Plus, I often struggle to differentiate between my wants and needs when it comes to love. However, I think that I managed to create these two separate lists. Below is a condensed version of both of the lists:

Things I NEED in a Relationship (NON-NEGOTIABLE)

  •  great listening skills (someone who will hear what I'm saying, respond to me, ask me questions, and be interested in my thoughts) 
  • good communication skills (someone who communicates their issues to me, and allows me to feel comfortable enough to communicate mine to them. wants to talk to me every day, even if it is something small)
  • to reassure and affirm me often (I tend to overthink)
  • someone empathetic and compassionate (kind to strangers, my family, me)
  • physical affection !!!
  • my partner to notice the little things about me, and pay attention
  • my partner to read my writing, and appreciate how significant it is to me
  • my partner to love music, understand how important music is in my life, and appreciate that about me 
  • my partner to only give advice if I ask for it, and to comfort me when I am frustrated, upset, etc
  • my partner to make an effort and do little romantic gestures (flowers, playlists, write little notes, etc)
  • someone who isn't afraid to be corny lol
  • someone to embrace my quirks, and accept me completely (despite my flaws)
  • my partner to be open to making changes (or sacrifices) to strengthen the relationship
  • someone who loves animals
  • someone with a sense of humor
  • someone the same as me politically 
  • someone who I have some shared interests with
  • NOT A MAN!


Things I WANT in a Relationship (negotiables)

  • someone who is an activist 
  • to play videogames and boardgames with my partner
  • to explore new hobbies together
  • someone to read with me (book club)
  • someone spiritual, but not necessarily religious 
  • my partner to watch all kinds of movies and shows with me, even if they may not like it
  • my intelligence to be appreciated 
  • someone who shares (food, belongings, etc) 
  • someone who will listen to me sing and play my instruments, despite how annoying it may be (lol)
  • to be prioritized 

    There are my condensed lists. I know a lot of it may seem a bit convoluted, but I truly don't think I could survive in a relationship that had anything less than what I included. I truly just need to feel loved. That's it. And to me, everything that I included relates back to that. Part of being a Pisces is having high standards for how you're loved, or what it means to you to be loved. That is definitely something I have struggled with all my life, thinking that if I don't have everything in a relationship, that maybe it isn't worth it. Or, that maybe my standards were too high, and I was just never gonna get everything I want. That if I wanted to find love, I may need to settle. And that just didn't seem fair to me. Don't I deserve to be loved in the same ways I love others? Don't I deserve the same effort, the same commitment, the same appreciation? Am I doomed to be with someone who is apathetic? Or worse, am I doomed to be alone? I can't know for certain. 

    Below are a couple images that I saw on Tiktok one day that I think are a great way to start my next discussion. I want to talk about how I identify with the traits Pisces show regarding our relationships with love. When I read these posts, I think I finally began coming to terms with the fact that I may be a romantic. Of course, I do all of the gestures of a hopeless romantic in my relationship, yet I try to be lowkey about it. Or, I try to downplay it. But it IS the truth. I love love. I love showing affection, I love doing little gestures. I love rom-coms, and I don't just date for fun. As the post mentioned, I am looking for a life partner. I want to have a beautiful, life-long partnership with a person who is entirely in love with me, and I with them, And the struggle comes in because my version of love is seemingly too idealistic for the average person. And so, the way people show love to me may seem underwhelming, because of my grandeur expectations/dreams. Of course, this applies to both romantic and platonic love.



    Perhaps the best thing I can do is to try to view my relationships with my loved ones less ideally and more realistically. It will prove difficult, I am sure, but I feel like I will never be completely content unless I pull my head out of the clouds. It is rare that real life is like rom-coms, I believe that in order for me to be truly happy in my relationships, I must shift my perspective on love again. Astrology has helped me to become self-aware. Now it is time for me to start working on myself, and to change my expectations to be more realistic when it comes to love. I KNOW that my loved ones love me back, of course, but their way of showing it is just...different than how I do. And that's okay! I just need to remember that just because they maybe aren't loving me in the way I ideally wish, it doesn't mean that the love isn't there. 

    That about wraps up this blog! It's not super long, but this is a topic I have been wanting to talk about on here. I have never really spoken about it to anyone except my best friend, and we only recently discussed it the other day. I am really glad that my chart helped me to realize this part of myself, and how much I crave love. I look forward to seeing how my views further develop. As always, thanks for reading y'all. I'll see you soon.

    XOXO
    - Rach



 

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